Why my period was so painful for over 30 years

I have been so enjoying the knowledge I am gaining doing the EVEolution™ online course, a revolution in women’s wellness. I have known Mish for some years now - done workshops with her, presented LifeART for her Women’s Health & Fitness Summit and deservingly Mish was awarded Educator of the year by AusActive in 2021. It was a no brainer to become an EVEolution partner and of course I have been deep diving into the course myself before I officially launch it on Sunday 29 May.

I completed the 4th of the 6 modules a week or so ago, a deep dive into the Women’s monthly menstrual cycle & navigating, understanding and celebrating our monthly bleed - our period.

At 61, I am in menopause and have found myself reflecting on each stage in my life as I do the course. Given it’s very much focused on keeping women active & moving all the way through the stages in their lives - to know there is support and solutions to be our best healthiest selves is both comforting, inspiring and empowering. It’s also great to know we are not alone and our complex health issues connected to womanhood are real, valid and it’s absolutely OK to talk about them openly.

Interesting Module 4 - Periods, periods, periods, really brought up some deep seated personal emotional reflection & release. For this reason, I want to share my story around my own menstrual cycle history. If it resonates & helps even one person, it was worth writing. The landscape of Women’s health and fitness is going through some vital and much needed integral change.  

Here is my story - Menstruation Memories and why my period was so painful for over 30 years.

I was a very serious ballet student - small in stature and small boned, physically told not ideal, however I was obsessed from age 3 when my Mum took me to see the Nutcracker. At 15 I got my period - it felt like a curse, it was painful, heavy and lasted a full week. It only caused incredible stress and difficulty with my dance training. I was at the point I trained 7 days a week after school and on weekends. My mother had awkwardly told me about periods - because I’d heard from a friend at school, that when you become a woman, sometimes you can’t go swimming because you might bleed to death! I was beside myself with this distressing information and shared it with my Mum. She then explained women bleed each month and it was very inconvenient and we just have to shut up and put up with it. Her own mother had never explained anything to her and she did her best to comfort me & said ‘it’s part of being a woman so you can have children’.

When I went to London at age 17 to train with my Mentor & ballet teacher, I was kind of secretly pleased my period just stopped. There was no chance I was pregnant & I was training very intensively, so this was great for me, I was delighted! There was no condition name then and I didn’t really talk to anyone about it. (Ref: Amenorrhea in Module 4 of EVEolution™ Course) For those thinking why didn’t she google it? . . . this was in the 70’s, so there was no such thing! No computers, mobile phones, no selfies, these resources we take for granted now, simply did not exist.

I joined London Festival Ballet* 8 months after I arrived in London to train at the London Dance Centre. My dream ambition had been to join THIS ballet company, my period stayed away . . . great I secretly thought. When I went home to Australia for a fleeting visit and told my Mum, she raced me off to the doctor, terrified I had ‘ruined myself’ and would never be able to have children. His diagnosis was as long as I’d had a period in adolescence I would be fine, I was simply a high-level athlete under a lot of physical stress and the body was giving me one less thing to cope with. Mum was relieved and so was I - not discussed again.

*Now known as English National Ballet

3 years later my period returned . . . it felt like the biggest curse in the world. Horrendous cramping & very heavy bleeding, I was continually worried I would be leaking thru my ballet gear or costumes and super awkward to be changing tampons and pads wearing all in ones for training and costumes often tutus!!! My body felt heavy and ached and that week each month felt like hell. I felt embarrassed and ashamed and lived on pain killers - it’s just wasn’t a thing to EVER take a day off in an international Ballet Company, let alone not be turning up for class, rehearsals and performances. I was on the other side of the world and kind of living in a monthly dread. I realize when I look back there is a tough determined stubborn side of me and that got me through, BUT it need not have been the case if a course like EVEolution had been available and conversation was shared openly in a supportive way. At this point let’s applaud and celebrate the progress being made - about bloody time . . . excuse the pun.

Before you write this story off as - ‘let it go it’s in the past.’     Fast forward 30 years - thru several careers, including theatre production in Opera & Musical Theatre and running a music charity for over 20 years. I was fortunate to have 2 sons in my 30’s but did suffer all the way through with debilitating heavy periods, cramping, headaches for at least 7 days each month, sometimes 10 or 12! I took a drug to lighten the bleed a bit and lived on Naprogesics. I could not take the pill either, it created major mood swings issues & after several different ones including the mini pill, the doctor told me I simply could not take it. I tried to accept it as my lot and bad luck as my Mum put it. To not talk about it and get on with my life!

When I was 42 my Mum was diagnosed with advanced stage 3 Ovarian Cancer at age 65 - it was a very difficult 3 years, nursing and supporting her with major surgery, 4 rounds of chemo and going through a marriage breakup with 2 little boys of 4 & 7. My Mum passed away in 2004 when I was nearly 45 and soon after I discovered a small lump in my right breast. I was sent off to a breast specialist as well as having an internal ultrasound to check my ovaries. The lump was not cancerous but I was advised to have it removed with a family history of maternal side breast cancer killing nearly all the females on my Mums side.

The really big revelation and major piece of my puzzle was when the Doctor performing the internal ultrasound said you have major thickening of the endometrium - do you have a lot of pain and heavy bleeding with your periods? Yes, I said, she said - you have a form of endometriosis,  it’s sad you have suffered for so long and it’s probably not worth surgery now as you will soon be in peri-menopause. It was both a relief and deep-seated grief I felt - finally my suffering in silence was a real condition and yet all those nearly 30 years, I had suffered most of it in absolute silence, feeling very alone.

As I did the EVEolution™ Module 4 and listened and absorbed the vital clear information Mish gives, I felt a deep emotional grief, how different that part of my life could have been armed with this great knowledge and guidance for support as well as sharing. I don’t have daughters but I felt relieved that with a source like this every young woman can view, learn, talk and share the cycle information. I love Mish’s seasonal analogy and I think it would be a great source for mothers, daughters, granddaughters and women embracing the wonders of being a woman and being active and healthy with appropriate knowledge and expert support.

Once I had my emotional memory moments, I felt a great sense of hope, positivity and empowerment to help my own clients and have this rich well of beautifully presented knowledge available for every person that I have the honor of training and working with. This can branch out to men as well, understanding women better can only strengthen & improve relationships & bring a greater sense of empathy, deeper understanding and compassion when it’s really needed. That alone can create a much healthier happier woman.

Thanks Mish - you have really created something long needed, that will make such a difference to so many woman’s lives.

 Andrea Gaze 13.5.22

APT is proud to be an EVEolution™ partner - launching this much needed resource officially with Mish Wright as a guest speaker on Sun 29 May & celebrating APT’s 14th Birthday – at Studio One & Beauty and the Beats Café in Richmond, Melb.

APT Well-BE-ing Sunday - Pilates, Posture, Pamper & Party on 29 May

Learn more / book:   https://aptbookings.as.me/sundaywellBEing2

EVEolution™ -  a revolution in women’s wellness.

Learn more here:  EVEolution™